Change Can Be Hard: 4 Steps to Successful Personal Change

It can be very hard to make a change in your life like starting a new diet, exercise regimen or a new life after a loss. It may involve changing a bad habit or behavior like negative thinking, fear or anxiety.

Change can involve some level of risk and difficulty, but in the long run not making that change can cause a bigger risk.  Over time, without making changes and self-improvement, you could be settling for mediocrity and complacency.  When trying to get motivated to make any changes, it may be worth looking at the long-range costs of clinging to the status quo.

 There are four ways to look at making a successful change:

• Be clear on your goal
• Know the stage of change you are in
• Know the knowledge you need to move the needle forward
• Know the support systems you need to sustain that change

In coaching training, there was a tool that was very helpful in getting clear on a goal and what was desired.  We wrote it down, I like excel spreadsheets for tracking, but the idea is you write down what you want, the steps you will take each day to move towards that goal and have some built in rewards and consequences on the action steps.

You can also use the SMART goal approach where your goal should be Specific, Measurable, Action based, Realistic and Time bound.  Making small or tiny action steps can be a more manageable way to approach heading toward a goal.  This helps you not “bite off more than you can chew”.

 Knowing what stage of change you are in can be very helpful. You may or may not be ready to change. Here are the stages:

• Precontemplation- you may have just started to think about making a change but some additional time and information may be needed to get ready.
• Contemplation – you are getting more serious about putting some action steps together and may make that change within the next six months.
• Preparation – you are ready to change and have the information and plan you need and are getting excited about the possibility.  Action is usually take within 30 days.
• Action – you have taken action and built new practices in the first six months
• Maintenance – you are doing the new behavior change automatically and consistently for more than 6 months.

It is not uncommon to “relapse” and start over and that is okay!  This leads to the next two ways to make your changes more successful.

Know the knowledge you need to move the needle forward and the support you need to ensure you are successful.  You may need to research all of your options fora new diet or a new exercise regimen.  If you need to change a behavior like negative thinking, or fear and anxiety, it may take some more introspection and talk therapy to identify how to move forward and improve in those areas.

It is always wise to get the support you need when undergoing a change either by choice or not. You could consider a support group, an accountability partner or coach.  You decide what works best for you.  Some people really move the needle with a group environment, and some do better with a one-to-one environment.

Understanding how to connect your mind body and spirit is worthy. Spending time to delve into your true feelings, desires and wants is time well spent.  Practicing deep breathing regularly and meditation can also bring you a clearer vision.

 Know that you are creative, resourceful and whole and with some knowledge and support you can make those changes you desire.